The best $48 I have spent this week was on parking ticket.

I signed up a few weeks ago to attend a seminar hosted by the California State Board of Equalization at Cal Poly Pomona. The seminar is to help small businesses find success.

I am more of a “yoga, worship or vegan cooking” seminar kind of girl but when duty calls….

I arrived late to the seminar primarily due to my poor sense of direction. Upon arriving I walked down a hall of booths, all for government agencies with tables manned by men and women wearing suits. I’m sure my red pants and Birkenstock’s gave me away… I’m not as “business” as business would define it. I’m not ashamed of that because I like who I am. But it didn’t matter, insecurity started to set in. All of the sudden I started to feel like I was in over my head. I was handed a pack of paperwork and ushered into a room with more suits. Took my seat and listened to the mayor, and the vice president of somewhere and the head of another board.  All the while, I felt smaller and smaller. “Why am I even her?” kept repeating over and over in my brain. Finally, I settled with the fact that I could skim a little inspiring knowledge and walk away from the free seminar unscathed.

I grabbed a hummus and Kale Blazer for a quick bite down in the cafeteria and headed back up for one last speaker. It was a lesson on how to boost you social media marketing. I sat down and penned down everything the young man had to say about Facebook and Instagram. At the end I quickly left. I called my mom on the way to my car, sharing with her my disappointment, just to be greeted by a lovely white envelope under my wiper blade. I got in my car and drove home, angry, tired and feeling like I had just wasted my entire day.

I got to my house and had to pack for a trip I was taking to Washington but I couldn’t seem to shake the frustration of the $48 ticket. I sat on the couch for break and started to think back on the day. I remembered the last seminar and some of the key points he had made.

He started off by saying “It’s not about you” and “It’s not about making the sale”. He said it’s about them, it’s about community. It’s about letting others use the experience and wisdom that you have for no charge.

Hopeful, I thought “What do I have to share with the World?”

Before a second went by I had my answer, “nothing.”

I accepted that I wasn’t there yet. I am too young, too inexperienced and uneducated.

I got in my car to head to the airport, the Amanda Cook song; Voyage came on the stereo. The words immediately made me think of my older sister. She has been trusting God in ways she never has before. Worshiping Him in ways she never dared to before. So (illegally) I texted her the name of the song, the artist and the word “SOAK” which simply means, stop everything you’re doing at let the words of this song wash over you. Soak up the anointing.

As I pressed send it struck me that, I, in all of my youth, inexperience and lack of education have a wealth of experience in the grace and love of God. It was in that moment that I knew what I had to share. Since then, I haven’t been able to stop writing. I haven’t stopped pouring out what I know of Him and His love. God don’t let it ever stop. I want my life to be an endless praise of you.

Song: It is Well (Live) (Kritstene DiMarco)